I had no idea, when I set out on my mission to help Guppy sleep, that making decisions on how to care for my own son could cost me friendships.
In a world with such incredible technology, were every mama
can find a study, blog, report, website etc. to support their parenting decisions, we end up surrounded by “my way or the highway mommies”. It seems that we live in a time where each of us feels that how we do things with our babies is the only way that things can or should be done. So, lets get this straight, we teach our children to be open minded and accepting, all the while
we’re not. This just doesn’t add up for me.
It’s no secret that Guppy had colic, he cried…a lot. It’s no secret that I battle postpartum depression and every one knows that Guppy HATES to sleep! It’s also no secret that I tried nearly every suggestion I was given, read five sleep books and STILL couldn’t
help Guppy to sleep – so we called in a professional!
Little did I know that this would be the beginning of the end for some of my friendships. Our experience with the sleep consultants was great. We worked with the amazing team at Precious Moments Babeez, specifically Debbie Fazio and I have no regrets! She was very dedicated to helping us, and ensuring that all of Guppy’s
needs were met and that he was never being put through any unnecessary stress. She was our coach and cheerleader and stood by us through the whole experience. We quickly started to see Guppy getting more and more restorative sleep (and that meant I started to get some too!). He was happier, so much happier and so
One would think that your friends (regardless of how they handle
these issues in their own homes) would be so happy to see you and your family thriving again, but evidently not! Instead, the cracks start to form, and the friendships start to dissolve. People that you once talked to nearly every days, well now you don’t. Instead, they climb to the top of their soap box and declare to all who will listen that they would “never” sleep train their baby.
They don’t hesitate to tell everyone just how horrible it is, though they have never actually done it. They know the little bits that they have learned from other mothers or read about on the internet, far from the whole picture but none the less they know you’re wrong. They never look at you the same again.
It is sad, and you miss them. You even second guess yourself (but
only for a second). Then you remember, these friends have never walked in your shoes, and they really can’t know what they might do. You look at your baby who is happy and healthy and thriving and you know that you did what was best for your family.
So whether it is sleep training, feeding, potty training, or any other challenge of parenting. We need to remember that the decisions
that we make are best for us while others will make the decisions best for them. Be confident in your choices and respect those of others.
By: Sarah Sansom
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