As a professional dedicated to educating and supporting parents on how to care for their newborns, it infuriates me when products are pulled off the market because they are used incorrectly. There are so many products that have been developed over the years to help parents with their babies and because our lack of educating parents on these products, they are used incorrectly and ultimately banned for sale or use because it was posing dangerous issues, injury or death. If we would just take some time to educate parents rather than assume they will figure it out on their own, these situations could have been prevented. The newest target effecting new parents is swaddling. Are you kidding me!! Do you realize what will happen if you they ban swaddling. Babies will have a harder time sleeping, parents will have a harder time soothing, postpartum depression will increase, the risk of SIDS and Shaken Baby Syndrome will increase. It angers me that rather than taking some time to teach proper swaddling techniques and the proper time to use swaddling, they just want to take it away. When did our highly educated society become so against education? It saddens me that parents are left with little direction and support on caring for newborns and then we are the ones they blame. Obviously I am an advocate for swaddling! Yes, it does help babies sleep better because it reduces the startle reflex! Yes, it does give parents a tool to help soothe and calm babies because it makes them feel safe and secure! Yes, it decreases Postpartum Mood disorders because parents and babies are sleeping better! Yes, it decreases SIDS because parents are not tempted to place babies on their belly to sleep or bed sharing! Yes, it decreases Shaken Baby Syndrome because parents don’t become frustrated when they can’t calm their baby! However…and here’s your education portion for today…listen up “leaders” who keep banning everything because they don’t want to spend the money on babies and parents! 1. Make sure to focus swaddling efforts on your babys arms and leave the legs and hips loose to accommodate for proper hip growth and development. 2. If you are using a blanket, make sure it is a 42x42 inch thin blanket that is secure and tucked around their body so that it does not get loose causing a suffocation hazard. Also be sure not to swaddle the head or face area. 3. It is preferred that parents use a product such as a Halo Swaddler or Woombie Swaddler which offers an easy swaddling system that will leave ample room for leg and hip growth and less room for swaddling errors. 4. Swaddling helps baby sleep better so it is important that parents do not let babies oversleep and miss feeds as this could cause baby to go into shock, be malnourished and reduce breastfeeding success. Babies should be fed regularly throughout the day without exceeding more than 2-3 hours between feeds in those early months. 5. Never place baby on their tummy to sleep…never place baby on their tummy to sleep while swaddled! 6. Do not over heat baby by placing them in too many layers. Diaper, Pj and swaddle is usually enough. Do not layer blankets or extra clothing on baby. You can learn proper swaddling techniques through one of our professional team members or at one of our NEW Babeez Ed Classes which is revolutionizing parenting by educating parents on newborn care topics before baby comes! Stop banning and start educating!!!
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Every time I think of the concept of “Attachment Parenting” my blood pressure boils. As a mom and a professional, I am so insulted and infuriated by this coined term. To label a parenting style in this manner means that any other style would mean “Unattached Parenting” and this notion is ridiculous.
I’m not here to bash Attachment Parenting because this is a parenting style that works for many families. However, it is not always the best for every family, every child, every parent or every situation. The claims made that any other parenting style is harming our children or breaking the bond between baby and parent or even worse, nurturing unattached and unconnected children who will grow up without empathy, caring, security or confidence is ludicrous. Our society needs to understand that what might be right for one family is not right for the other. The “Attachment Parenting” world has such big views and big voices about their parenting style but to make others feel terrible about the parenting style they choose, is unfair. As a mother, who had 3 children under 16 months (singleton and twins) and a husband who worked 14 hours a day with no support or finances to get support, there was no way I could possibly use the “Attachment Parenting” approaches suggested today. I was the ONLY care provider for my children and to baby-wear, breastfeed on demand, bed-share and try to get at least 3 hours of sleep per day were impossible. I needed to have a rigid schedule and routine to ensure that my children were fed, cleaned and healthy. Now does this mean, because I did this my children were not loved? Absolutely NOT! I was with my children all day, every day. We hugged and kissed all the time, we snuggled on the floor, we played together at home and at the park, we ate every meal together, we spent every waking moment together AND WE STILL DO! The bond between my daughters and I is so strong that I still have trouble cutting the apron strings as they grow older. However, when it was time to feed, they ate and when it was time to sleep, they slept in their own crib. I didn’t run to every cry because guess what, the other twin baby was crying and needed my attention at that moment. Or the twins would cry and I was helping my toddler who was sick with fever. Or everyone was crying and I had to leave the room for a moment because I was crying too! I dare any person out there to tell me I was a bad mother. I dare any person to challenge my bond, caring, nurturing and LOVE for my children. My oldest daughter is now 13 and my twins are 12. They are compassionate, kind, loving, intelligent, patient, generous and we still do things together every day. I am so tired of hearing that “Attachment Parenting” is BEST for baby and is BEST for Mommy. I see clients every day feeling the exact same pressures I did to be the perfect mother. To be able to wear baby all day, sleep with baby all night and hold them in between. I see the anxiety, the depression and the feel of failure because they feel they are harming their baby and breaking the bond and risking raising a criminal because they need to sleep, they need their baby in their own crib, they need to eat but haven’t been able to because they have been holding baby for the last 6 months. Attachment Parenting is NOT for everyone. Our society and the professionals and individuals out there pushing their parenting style down everyone’s throat is unfair and very judgemental. If you are an Attachment Parent and this style is working for you and your family, this is wonderful! But please stop making your friend feel bad because she’s not. Stop posting mean comments on social media to families who chose to sleep train their child for whatever reason. You never know what kind of day someone is having and reading or hearing a comment about their parenting style could be what pushes them over the edge. The reason why this is such a hot topic is because it’s a debate. It has been a debate for the last 60 years and it will be a debate for the next 60 years. There is no 1 way to lose weight, there is no 1 way to bake a cake and there is no 1 way to parent a child. I leave you with a final message. If you are a parent out their torn between how to parent your child, keep this in mind… 1. show love and compassion to your baby 2. Touch, hug and kiss your baby as often as possible every day for the rest of their life 3. Enjoy every waking moment with your baby spending quality time together 4. Encourage your baby to explore his world and learn skills that will help him grow and thrive as a young child and adult 5. Be present in your baby’s life through emotional, verbal and physical interaction. These are the steps to successful parenting! I call it the "Nurture Parenting" Approach! |
This is a great place to ask your questions. Anything from prenatal to preschool. From feeding to sleeping...ask away!
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